Why we get obsessed (also an explanation for S&M)

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Why do we get obsessed?

It seems like such a simple question, but the answers lie so deep inside that we fail to figure out the patterns underneath. Its a reason for why you’re so lazy, and a reason behind women wanting to be tied up in the bedroom. Where is this reason, you ask?

The reason is this – We want to go back to a past occurrence or pattern to try to figure it out. In this quest of figuring it out we give up a lot of our lives (time) to get the final answer.

The question could be – why was I abused as a child, or why was I raped as a minor, why did that girl reject me, or even why is a brain more functional sometimes and other times not at all.

The answer, it seems, can only be found by going down into the pattern deeper and deeper. Which is why someone men and women like to be abused in their relationships, some people get fatter and fatter, and why others become interested in very specific fetishes.

Your past dictates your present. And in this situation, there is a strong need to find the pattern and to solve the puzzle. Why did my father beat me up or why did my neighbour worship witches. It could be anything, and we repeat the patterns to try to figure it out.

See, when we are back into the same game, we get a better understanding of that game. We get sucked into it and repeat the same thing over and over, until we learn something new. Dad beats son, son becomes dad, now he beats his own son, and so on and so forth. Humans get obsessed over things consciously and sub-consciously.


Patterns that we find everywhere, gives us a better understanding of where we’re going, and whether its better to live on the same pattern or find new ones.

See, patterns are dangerous, in that, they seem like everything is straight-forward and structured. Although, patterns are quite calming, they pose a different challenge to us. A challenge of entertainment. We see a pattern (a relationship, a career, a life) and we want more out of it now. We want more entertainment out of the existing pattern. When we don’t receive the entertainment, we get extremely outraged and annoyed. This outrage fuels self-hatred.


photo credit: ecstaticist via photopin cc



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